Don't get divorced if at all possible. If there is any chance to save your marriage take it. Your about to head into one of the toughest journeys of your life. If you have children then the pain and damage may be irreparable. Forget the fact that you will probably spend all your money on lawyers or that you'll suffer anxiety on a daily basis for the entire time your fighting it out. And once you bring the "system" into your family their there for good and many of your decision making rights for you and your children are gone.